It is true that God said, “It is not good for man to be alone.” I would never dispute that but what I would argue is that statement doesn’t mean a man has to have a woman to complete him.

You’ve undoubtedly heard the saying, “She completes me, or she’s my better half.” Well that sounds good, and is meant to be a compliment I’m sure, but the problem is it simply isn’t true. God never intended for a man or woman to find their fulfillment in a earthly mate. He designed us to find our fulfillment by way of his Spirit. All other people and things cannot do the job.

While my wife and I aren’t necessarily what some would call experts on relationships or marriage we have had quite the go at it. We dated, lived together before we were married, were married, divorced and now finally remarried. Whew! As you can see we have been at this thing from just about every angle imaginable so we do know a few things about it. What we did learn though is marriage can’t work properly without Jesus Christ in the center of it.

Most counselors say disagreements over money is the biggest source of trouble for most relationships. I wouldn’t say I totally disagree with that although I think there is one that is far more important and that’s God. Without God I can’t see how any marriage works whether there is money or not, but with God anything can be worked out.

Getting back to my point here with two halves not making a whole. When there is a man or woman seeking to find fulfillment in their mate rather than being whole in Christ it is bound to fail. I have a friend who once said, “Two people looking for the other to make them whole is like two ticks with no dog.” In the early stages of romance it may seem like it’s working but it can’t last forever. If the man and woman are finding their individual fulfillment in their relationship with God and they’re bringing that into their marriage; now you’re talking. Otherwise there can never be any satisfaction found. Codependency is never a good ingredient for a marriage. If you continuously find yourself in need of a man or woman to make you feel complete you need to look to God because he is the source of life.

Do you remember the story about the woman at the well found in chapter four of the Gospel of John? I won’t retell the story here, but the woman had been married five times and she was living with a man at the time. The woman was looking for those men to fulfill her in a way they never could. Jesus ,on the other hand, told her “If you drink of the water I will give you, you will never thirst again, in fact you will have a well of water springing up in you.” Jesus promised her she would receive what she had been looking for all along if she would only look to him to make her whole.




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