I received a call this morning from Joyce Zander concerning her 88 yr. old auntie being in the hospital. She wasn’t sure if she would be at jail tonight, so she made arrangements for a deputy to accompany Tammy and me if we still wanted to lead the service. We both agreed and waited and prayed for a healing. When the time came we were all available as God provided the way. Starting out with praise and worship with Nicole Mullins was a perfect start.
When Joyce called my name, I asked the ladies if they were sick and tired of being sick and tired and many hands went up. I was asking this because there is rest that God promises us in Hebrews 4:1, if we would put our faith in Him. I talked about when God made the whole earth in 6 days; the last thing He made was man. So think about this, man’s first day on the planet was to rest. But somehow we think if we aren’t busy, worried or in control, then it won’t get done, but that is simply not true.
The point I was making was how we are always going to be tempted to get out there into the drama. There is always going to be something we are going through. Hebrews 4:12 talks about how the “Word of God is living and active and sharper than any two edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart.” In our soul, there is always movement, like our joints and thoughts. That’s okay. In our Spirit is the center, where the marrow and our intentions are, that’s where we draw life from. The struggle is good for us because we are growing up into maturity. God is looking for a son to take over the family business, but do you have the passion, and concern like the Father does. Can He trust you with the inheritance? How does He find out? How does He show us? He works this out through our trying and failing and then finally our resting in Him. The good news is we can have rest in our Spirit at the same time our soul is a mess.
That was the theme of the counseling tonight, it seemed. There is so much drama going on in the cell and a few of these ladies are asking me what they should do about it. One of my girls makes fun of herself along side the ones in the cell making fun of her. The other girl said she moved to the suburbs to stay out of the drama; meaning the cell is split in two categories, “I moved from the ghetto to the suburbs, Miss Tracey, they read their bible in the morning in the suburbs and have popcorn prayer before bed at night.” She told me.
Although I listened to five ladies tonight, but there is one in particular I wanted to tell you about. This lady has been through the tough stuff. Her whole adolescent life she wanted and craved attention from her mom and dad, but never got it. When she had her own children, she made sure they got what she wanted growing up. However, since her daughter has been alive, she has been in and out of jail and not bonded with her. The little girl is now 11 years old and knows how to work the system to her benefit. This lady I am talking about almost lost all hope of breaking the generational curse. But God is calling her name and He has her undivided attention. She told me as she was leaving her cell to meet me, she thought, “He, (the Lord) is going to speak to me through this church lady”. I heard her say, that she has hope. There is hope in Jesus and I saw something in her tonight I have never seen, and was happy to see the change. A smile came over her and brightened up the room. It was getting late, like midnight late, so we plan to get together next week right after services.
I could tell she was sick and tired of being sick and tired, but now we were both just tired.
Written by Tracey